What’s an inspiration-high? Upon returning from a camp, a retreat, a tour, or a conference…it is common to be filled with the environment of the friends you met, the experiences, and the memories. Back to cold reality, nostalgia is your closest friend; and you cling to the pictures, the conversations. You’re in inspiration-high mode. The thing is, while some wile away their days dreaming of their treasured times, others strive to turn their inspiration-high into something productive and worthwhile, and in the end, make the experiences that they had into something that would permanently become part of their identity, so they won’t forget.
But what, exactly? Well, supposedly they would be inspired to write a lot of poetry, avidly research a topic, or start practicing 8 hour a days. So filled with the passion that sprung up during their time away, the spark of interest would become a life-long hobby and activity. Oh, this is our dream. Our intentions are good, our hearts are in the right place, and the future lies ahead. But the question is…can we really persevere and keep the inspiration-high? Or will we let it die within two weeks, and it will only serve as a fond memory, and later, something to stick onto our high school resume, to show the colleges that we ‘indulged in our interests’ during the golden days of summer?
Some of us, I believe, really do take that step forward. They start planning, and start doing, all as a result of that inspiration-high. They dream big, they plan, they take action. But you ask, “how long will this last”? However we swore that the time we spent away at the event was life-changing and eye-opening, how much of it do we ourselves believe? Will we keep going with our new interest to turn it into something worthwhile? Or will we let it fall off the sidewalk sooner or later? Change is so hard.
Harp camp was wonderful and amazing. Judy Loman is a goddess. She’s so gentle and patient, though I heard that she used to be really fierce and strict. She sometimes goes, “eh?” at the end of her sentences, which is adorable. But however a cute, little, 75 year old lady she looks (with tiny hands), she’s so different on stage. She hugs the harp, and the sound she can bring out of that wide-spaced Salzedo is lush and full, with not a single buzz. She performed all of Salzedo’s variations all from memory. Her rippling fuchsia dress and high-heeled silver gladiator shoes only added to her fierce and emotional vision of perfection. She’s both strong mentally and physically. I admire her greatly. She is endurance, she is strength, she is patience, and she is the endeavor.
She wants me to study with her for three weeks at a time in the summer. It’s such an honor. At first, it was just so overwhelming. I thought; does this change my future? Am I going to Toronto to study for college? Will I become a famous harpist? What does Judy expect me to be? I was so filled with images of the future that I almost forgot what lay ahead of me. Just because Judy Loman (goddess though she is) approves of me and wants me to study with her does not mean that my future is set in stone and I am, in a way, “insured.” I still have much hard work, practice, and experience ahead of me to achieve anything. Besides, there’s so much more in my life. All my aspirations for my school work, high GPA, and my dream schools: Julliard and Colombia. The future changes with every decision I make; I must keep that in mind to keep on the straight path. One step at a time, as long as I keep my eyes up and my footsteps planned in perfect precision.
1 comments:
nicely written melody! :)
and it's so true unfortunately about the inspiration highs.
but don't be too hard on yourself. we've all experienced this high, and although it seems like nothing really changed after 2 weeks and all of it seemed like "it was for waste" (at least that's what i felt) you still do carry some sort of thought and motive out from it whether its small or big.
not many people, if any, take the huge step but instead they just take the experience as something to keep in mind- to remember the feeling whether its religious, musical, academic, etc etc.
i think you should be satisfied enough to already get something worthwhile out of camp, its not just a feeling, its something that will happen in reality. so you can use that for a sense of confidence and just continue practicing like you did...just now with a sense of more purpose.
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